Ear Today and Gone Tomorrow

My digging partner and I called at at a farm one sunny spring day to ask permission from the farmer to detect on his fields. As we approached the farm house in the car (I was driving), this big daft-looking labrador dog with great big slobbering chops came bounding towards us followed by the farmer. I don't know if I have ever mentioned this before, but I don't like dogs or cats, even though we have owned several dogs over the years, we just don't get along for some reason. I don't wish them any harm or anything, they just don't seem willing to reciprocate the feeling.

So anyway, Tom (my mate who knew I wasn't keen on dogs either) said "You stay in the car Bill, I will go and talk to the farmer." So out of the car he gets and walks over to meet the approaching farmer, and all seemed very friendly. After a few minutes I began to feel a bit of a twit sitting in the car, as Tom and the farmer were getting along nicely and having a pleasant chat, and so I decided to venture out and sure enough as soon as my foot touched the ground, slobber chops came bounding over to check me over and thankfully after a good sniff in the place where all dogs like to sniff, he didn't seem to find me very interesting and wandered off back towards the farmer.

Just then a young lad came out of the farmhouse with his head swathed in fresh white bandages. The farmer seeing the boy and the bandages, began telling Tom the reason he was wearing them, which I also heard as I walked up to them. It seems they had just returned from being airlifted to the general hospital, as earlier that morning old slobber chops (who was now sat next to the farmer and drooling away happily but staring at my leg) had jumped up at the lad and bitten off his ear for no apparent reason. They immediately called the emergency services and explained what had just taken place. The hospital decided time was of the essence contacted the emergency services who in turn dispatched a helicopter to rush the boy to hospital, where they hoped to save his ear and stitch it back on, but unfortunately it seems the dog had swallowed it.

The hospital told them the lad could be fitted with an artificial ear in the future and no-one would know the difference - other than old slobber chops of course...

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